The Breakfast Club: X Men Style
by Tainted Memory
Summary: (Updated) If you've seen The Breakfast Club, you'll get a kick out of this. Its like the, except with an X-Men twist that K.C. and I have created.
1. Detention From Hell

Disclaimer: I do not own any X-Men characters, or anything to do with The Breakfast Club.  
  
This is a story written about five students who find themselves locked in school on a Saturday, when they'd all rather be off doing something else. It's co-written by K.C.2007, I am in no way taking all of the credit for this. Enjoy!  
  
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"But Principal Kelly! All I did was skip school to go to a soccer game!" Jean Grey stood up, looking upset.  
  
"Look missy, you skipped school and missed four finals. I'm not going to excuse you just because you're the captain of the soccer team! Now, I want you here on Saturday, no exceptions!"  
  
~~~That Saturday~~~  
  
Walking in, Jean took a seat at one of the six tables in the library, noticing that at the moment, she was the only one there. Sighing, she rested her chin on her hand, waiting to get it over with.  
  
Stepping into the library, Duncan Matthews smiled a little more when he saw Jean sitting there. Silently taking a seat at the same table as her, he set his lunch on the floor beside the chair.  
  
Not long after, Scott Summers walked in, not looking at either of them. Keeping his eyes on the floor, he sat at a different table, still keeping his eyes averted from those much more popular than him.  
  
Walking in, and stealing a few things from the library counter on his way to sit, Lance Alvers propped his feet on the table he chose. Not unaccustomed to being there, he just sat there and waited for it to begin.  
  
Stalking to the very back table, and sitting heavily in the chair, Wanda Maximoff scowled at any of the other four who even dared to look at her. Noticing the look that Duncan and Jean traded, she glared, silently plotting their doom at another time.  
  
As Principal Kelly walked in, he stared at them all as if they were some deadly plague that he'd catch if he wasn't careful. Setting a piece of paper and a pencil in front of each of them, he started talking.  
  
"I expect each of you to write a 2,000 word essay on why you think you deserve to stay at this school. If I'm not pleased with your essays, you'll be expelled without a thought." The only two that didn't look at him in shock were Lance and Wanda, who just kept glaring. "You aren't to talk while you're in here, just write your essays. I'll be across the hall, and the door WILL be open, so don't try anything."  
  
The silence started to settle in, except for a faint drumming-like sound. Trying to find the source of the sound, they all look back at Wanda, who's tapping her nails on the table. Slowly looking up, she notices them staring. 


	2. Search And Rescue

Disclaimer: I own only myself, my four alter egos.  
  
By the way, my name is K.C. and I'm co-writing with Tainted Memory.  
  
TM: Yes, I'm the one who gets to make all of the spiffy revisions! Go Me! Except for this chapter, I was talking to five different people, and eating dinner, so I cant assure you that it's the best quality! OH WELL!  
  
So, here we go with Chapter Two!  
  
~~~~~  
  
*What the hell are they looking at?* Wanda asked herself silently, and drew her dark eyes back to the table. She found a pencil and began carving into the table with it. Jean Grey turned around and her eyes widened.  
  
"Wanda! That's school property!"  
  
She said frantically, as Scott and Duncan looked up; both with the same purpose. Thankfully, For Jean, she had chosen to wear a turtleneck that day, instead of her usual low cut shirt.  
  
*Damn*, thought Duncan, *this is so boring.*  
  
Lance's hollow laughs echoed through the quiet library.  
  
"Oh my GOD Wanda! What *shall* we do if we destroy school property?" he said in a sarcastic, high pitched voice and kicked over a chair. Jean gave him a look.  
  
"Get off it you juvenile delinquent!"  
  
Lance narrowed his eyes as he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees.  
  
"And what are *you* going to do about it?" He said, and then grinned evilly.  
  
"Tell me Jeannie, have you ever heard the song 'Like A Virgin'?"  
  
Jean stiffened immediately and Duncan stood up threateningly, but Scott and Wanda barely stifled their laughs. Lance stood up to meet Duncan's sardonic gaze, and his dark brown eyes flashed.  
  
"You don't *Even* wanna start with me, Matthews."  
  
He said crossing his arms. Duncan threw him a hate-filled glance before sitting back down. After twenty minutes of silence, Lance stood up and peeked out of the library windows. He grinned triumphantly and pulled a screwdriver out of his pocket.  
  
He crouched down and began picking at the screws on the door. Jean and Duncan looked up, as well as Scott and Wanda. Scott looked extremely nervous, Wanda was grinning as much as she ever did, (which wasn't a lot), but Duncan looked like he was about to crack.  
  
"OH my gosh, Lance stop it! What are you doing?!" Lance whistled slightly as a screw fell out of the doorframe. He grinned and quickly backed away from the door as he heard the tapping footsteps of Principal Kelly. He quickly went back to his seat as the door opened.  
  
"WHAT WAS THIS DOOR DOING-", Principal Kelly stopped his rant as he saw the screw rolling across the floor.  
  
"That's IT, Alvers!" he shouted and grabbed Lance's shirt collar. Wanda narrowed her dark eyes and growled deep in her throat as Principal Kelly tugged Lance out of the library. He turned to the rest of them.  
  
"Move and DIE," he growled before dragging Lance out, letting the door close behind him.  
  
Lance struggled against Kelly, growling before Kelly finally shoved him into the janitor's closet.  
  
"I dare you to try and get out you little delinquent. "Principal Kelly growled before slamming the door shut. Lance banged his fists on the door before sliding to the ground.  
  
"Damn him...He's going to pay for this." Lance muttered to himself.  
  
~~~~~  
  
"Damn him to hell! He took Lance!" exclaimed Wanda, standing up and speaking for the first time. Jean turned around and looked at her.  
  
"What can we do, Maximoff? We have to stay in here!" She exclaimed.  
  
"Like hell we do." She muttered, "You little goodie goodies can sit your asses right here while I go and find him."  
  
Surprisingly, Scott stood up also, though very timidly.  
  
"I know we shouldn't but...ya know, we can't just leave him where ever Kelly put him." Duncan grinned and stood up too, looking for an excuse to get out of the room.  
  
"Well come on then!" He said and tugged Jean to her feet, who looked around and finally gave in.  
  
"Fine", she sighed as Wanda peered out of the window. She spotted Principal Kelly walking absentmindedly down the hall, humming to himself. Duncan grinned evilly as he opened the heavy library door.  
  
"Search and Rescue has commenced." 


	3. Legend Of The Dirty Pillows

Disclaimer: This is a disclaimer disclaiming that I'm going to stop disclaiming anything after this, because, well, you should get the point of it by now. There will, however, probably still be notes and such up here, telling about future updates and other whatnot.  
  
TM: Oh, I have to give credit to Jason for coming up with some of these wicked lines.  
  
~~~~~  
  
Principal Kelly walked down the hall, hands tucked into his pockets, humming a tune through the quiet hallways.  
  
"This place is actually half-way decent without those snot nosed kids running around all day."  
  
Wanda, peeking around the corner, turns back, "We'll show him what being a snot nosed kid is all about." Following her lead, Scott, Duncan, and Jean all crept through the hallway before branching off into another.  
  
"So Wanda, do you have ANY idea of where we're really going?" Scott tried to keep up with her.  
  
"Nope, we're just gonna check every room until we find him!" Giving him a crazed grin, Wanda sped up, causing the others to speed up as well.  
  
With Scott and Jean keeping a close lookout for Kelly, Wanda went through every room single-handedly, stopping as she came to a locked janitor's closet. Slightly suspicious, she started the first part of the 'shave and a haircut' bit, and only had to wait a second or two before it was finished off.  
  
Looking around to make sure Principal Kelly wasn't nearby she pulled a lock- picking kit from her bag.  
  
"You carry that in your bag all the time?" Duncan asked, curiously. She just shrugged, focusing on getting the lock open.  
  
"You should see the OTHER stuff in my bag." The click of the lock let them know she'd successfully broken into a closet, but as soon as she stood up, the approaching footsteps of Principal Kelly could be heard.  
  
"Quick!" Lance hissed, pulling them all into the closet and closing the door. "There's godda be a way out of here!"  
  
"Of course there is!" Jean suddenly spoke up, causing the others to turn and look at her, silently wondering how she would know. She just smirked.  
  
"I've been in this closet a lot, and the janitor always ends up coming back right before I really get anything going, so we have to get out before he sees us." Pushing some boxes aside, she opened a trap door that led to an underground tunnel.  
  
Watching her in disbelief, Lance, Duncan, Wanda, and then Scott followed Jean into the tunnel, letting her lead the way. About five minutes later, just as Duncan was about to complain about the lack of light ruining his complexion, Jean stopped beneath a grate. Carefully lifting it a few inches, she peeked into the room above.  
  
"C'mon." letting Duncan and Lance help her up, she crawled back into the library, stepping back so the others could get out, too.  
  
A shriek of surprise is heard; a moment before Wanda pulls herself out, scowling.  
  
"Don't touch me again, Matthews, or ill shove my foot so far up your ass, that you'll pass a kidney stone through your nose." Easing away from her slowly, Duncan couldn't even take his seat before Scott stumbled from the grate and ran into him.  
  
"Sorry, Duncan, I got my shoelace caught in the grate." Scott sat down in his chair, leaving Duncan to scowl and sit on the table in front of his own chair.  
  
"So, Alvers, now that we're back with you in our wonderful lives, what do we do now?" Jean asked, in the normal 'I'm so much better than you' tone.  
  
"Well, Jeanie, the first thing I suggest is you fix your top." Lance grins arrogantly, and Jean looked down to notice that while going into the janitor's closet, and going through the tunnel, her shirt had become high enough that you could almost see her ~Dirty Pillows~ (P.O.T.C).  
  
She looked over towards Duncan, who was too busy staring to notice her glare, then looked at Scott, who was staring as well, but quickly looked away when her gaze turned to him.  
  
"Humph!" She quickly fixed her shirt, then dropped heavily into her chair, crossing her arms over her chest now.  
  
"So what do we do now, hmm? It'll be forever until Principal Kelly gets back."  
  
~~~~~  
  
A/N: P.T.O.C. may be referred to occasionally. This goes by 'phrase of the day'. Why? Well, because I have to say some things that I learn in every day life, and I just find them hilarious. Anywho, I'll get back to the important information now.  
  
Phrase Of The Day: Dirty Pillows.  
  
A derogatory word used to describe beasts. Popular in the seventies, I first heard the phrase on the movie Carrie, and it sent me into hysterics. It was fate; I just HAD to use it in my story.  
  
There we go, wasn't that fun? Heh, it was for ME! 


	4. How The Mighty Have Fallen

Here's my chappie. It's called How the Mighty Have Fallen. *blink*  
  
Disclaimer: I own NOTHING I Tell you! *NOTHINGGGGGGGGGGGGG*  
  
*cough*  
  
Author's Note: Sorry it took so long with the chappie, a bit preoccupied. Hehe, well here goes. This by the way is K.C. *blink* Beware.  
  
*snicker* Heh..she thinks a little much of herself, doesn't she? XD *sneaks off*  
  
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Wanda sighed as she looked up and was surprised to see Lance twirling a zip lock bag in front of him.  
  
"What -is- that?" she asked finally, although she knew very well what it was. Lance grinned as Jean and the others turned to look at him curiously.  
  
"What the hell do you think? It's my stash." He said casually, standing up near Scott, and looking up as he heard footsteps coming down the hallway. Lance's eyes widened as he snatched Scott's arm and stuffed the zip lock bag down the front of Scott's pants.  
  
Scott's eyes widened as he dove to a table, perching on the seat almost unsuccessfully as Principal Kelly came in. Kelly eyed them all suspiciously, Jean, Duncan, and Lance trying to withhold laughs as they looked innocently to their principal. Scott tried not to look terrified, while Wanda just smirks.  
  
"What's going on here? Alvers?" he did a double take. "Alvers?! How the hell did you-", he paused, "you're hiding something, Alvers..." Lance grinned.  
  
"What would I be hiding, Principal Kelly?" Kelly narrowed his eyes as he approached Lance.  
  
"I know you've been keeping drugs here. I hope you know that drug sniffing dogs will be all over your locker by next week."  
  
Lance smirked, "Well that won't help much, seeing as how it's in Summers's pants." Principal Kelly shot Lance an annoyed look as everyone else snickered, even Scott, though his face was still almost white as a ghost.  
  
"Whatever," was all he said, turning and leaving the room. Lance sighed as Scott anxiously tugged the bag out of the front of his pants, his face blood red now as he pushed the bag as far away as he could without standing up. Wanda smirked, looking over towards Lance.  
  
"Let me guess, that's what your in here for?" asked Duncan, "Drugs."  
  
Lance shook his head and looked at him incredously.  
  
"Are you kidding? That bastard would give me a hell of a lot more than detention if he found out what all I was stowing away for Christmas," he said casually, leaning back in his chair. Jean looked over at him curiously.  
  
"Then what'd you do?" Lance sighed a bit, tilting his head back.  
  
"Threatened to bring a gun to school." he said almost boredly, looking at the ceiling. The others looked at each other a bit.  
  
"Why?" asked Scott finally. Lance didn't look at him.  
  
"Just tired of the shit around her.needed more excitement." He said finally, putting his chair back down.  
  
"So that gives you a right to *shoot* people? Because you're BORED?" snapped Jean, Lance snapping his head towards her suddenly.  
  
"Shut the hell up about what you don't know about, Red!" he said angrily. Jean stood up.  
  
"Why should I? I mean, what could possibly make YOUR life so damn hard that you would take it out on other people like that?!" she shouted as she stood, Lance shooting out of his chair as well, towering over her by at least four inches.  
  
Lance grabbed her arm and just as Duncan stood up. Taking off the fingerless glove from his hand, Jean stared down at his wrist. Angry red marks stared back.  
  
"Bad enough that my foster dad tries to kill me in my sleep. Need to know more?" He asked extremely quietly, his eyes burning into hers. Jean's eyes brimmed with tears as she shook her head and pulled away.  
  
Lance let go of her and moved to the other side of the room as Wanda began humming to herself. Duncan looked up at Wanda, and then around at the rest of them, realizing they had unconsciously gathered in a small circle.  
  
Scott was sitting on the ground leaning against one of the tables, and Duncan was in the chair beside him facing Jean, who was sitting on another chair. Lance was sitting on a table, still away from Jean but closer to the others, and Wanda was sitting against a bookcase, feet propped up on a couple of dictionaries.  
  
"So what are *you* in here for?" Duncan asked Wanda finally. Wanda looked up, surprised. Dark makeup covered her eyes and hid the brightness of the brilliantly green eyes. (I believe they're green. Inform me if I'm wrong. XD) She looked around as all eyes and bodies turned to her.  
  
"Well, I didn't really have anything better to do." she said, surprising everyone, "Pietro and I are having a bit of difficulty living in the same house so I decided to come here. And my father.well, he's just a jackass." Jean sighed.  
  
"I wish *I* had come here by choice.." and Lance looked over at her.  
  
"What did a little Miss Perfect like you do anyway?" he asked a bit curiously. Jean narrowed her eyes but answered him anyway.  
  
"I skipped school to go to an out of town soccer game. I didn't want to skip school but it was a really awesome game and I just *really* wanted to see it. Damned Kitty Pryde turned me in." Lance snickered. "Ah, how the mighty have fallen.."  
  
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K.C: Hm, slightly interesting, I was trying to start showing signs of interest in each other of certain characters..XD Tainted and I will get into more of that later.  
  
*prods Tainted* Your turn XD  
  
*waves*  
  
T: Yeah, I know it's my turn, hold your horses will you? My cat ate the insects I need to have for a biology project; it actually brought me to tears because he ate my praying mantis, cicada, and katydid, which took me forever to catch! So I'm trying to solve that problem, if I don't update for a while. Oh, and on the last paragraph or so, I changed the word 'orbs' back to 'eyes', because it didn't seem to fit too well, heh, sorry. 


	5. Hormones and Hindsights

Quick Disclaimer: I disclaim owning anything in this story, except of course my own sick twisted sense of humor. XD  
  
Okay, here's the deal, y'all. If I don't see more reviews coming in, I'm gonna stop writing the story until I do! Well, okay, it wont really be up to me, but when I get K.C.'s next chapter, and there aren't reviews, I wont continue!  
  
This chapter is not intended for anybody over the age of.well.13 I suppose, fair warning!  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The others turned to look at Scott, who still sat on the floor, leaning against the table. One leg pulled up, his arms are wrapped around it, resting his chin on his knee. Not answering right away, he just watches them for a minute or so.  
  
"I asked you why you were in here, the least you can do is answer me," Lance growled.  
  
"Its not really your business, its my business and mine alone."  
  
Duncan and Lance both shifted uncomfortably at this, neither of them wanting to be brought down by some hopelessly nerdy guy who always found the necessity to wear those stupid read sunglasses.  
  
"Come on, just tell us." Jean smiled gently at him, but it wasn't until he looked over at Wanda, who just stared at him, that he told his answer.  
  
"I got caught cheating on a test." Lance actually laughed at the quiet answer Scott gave.  
  
"They put you in here for cheating??"  
  
"Yeah.well.I was cheating off of the teacher's paper." At Lance's curious look, Scott continued his story, "When he was sitting there just watching me as I took the paper and copied the answers."  
  
"Why do you have to cheat? I thought you were like, super smart." Jean gave him a curious look.  
  
"There's a reason that I'm smart. I mean, when I go home and pretend to study, I'm usually doing other stuff instead, so I have to do something to get the grades," Scott replied.  
  
Wanda's eyes suddenly flashed with a wicked understanding of what he said, even if he didn't mean anything serious by it.  
  
"So what do you do instead, Scotty boy?" Her voice was soft, but at the same time it was thick with superiority. Lance looked over, noticing the shift in her eyes, and a bell went off in his head as well. Scott just looked at her, not understanding.  
  
"What do you mean, what do I do instead?"  
  
"I mean what do you do instead of studying, if you just pretend to study, then you have to be in your room or something so nobody will see." Wanda looked over at Lance, who picked up and continued her sentence.  
  
"What you're really doing."  
  
"I really don't get what you guys are.oh.oh!" Duncan laughed at how fast Scott's face turned as red as the sunglasses he was wearing.  
  
"So you DO do that!" Wanda had an esoteric grin on her face, that only Lance and Duncan shared with her. Jean just shook her head, looking over at Scott.  
  
"You guys, leave him alone.I mean, even if he does do.that.instead of studying, you shouldn't make fun of him."  
  
"Come on, Red, don't be such an uptight bitch. You know it's hilarious."  
  
"Oh, and you don't jack off??" Jean spoke up louder, causing Scott to groan in discomfort. Wanda laughed once, then managed to stop her voice before she laughed again, not usually one to be the laughing type.  
  
Lance grinned, "Of course I do, but it's funny that this brainiac is nothing more than a pathetic nerd that can't even control his hormones."  
  
"That was low." Jean growled quietly.  
  
"So is what he does, if you really think about it." Wanda quickly remarked, causing Jean to blush now, obviously getting pictures of it now.  
  
"You guys are disgusting!"  
  
"Hey! I'm not a guy!" Wanda scowled, but laughed as Lance nudged her.  
  
"Okay Red, we'll get off of this subject, just because you're so -uncomfortable- with it..."  
  
"Thank you!" Scott and Jean both said in unison, causing the other three to break out into laughter again, much to their dismay.  
  
Trying desperately to change the subject, Jean turned to look at Duncan, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"Well why are YOU in here?" Duncan raised both eyebrows, surprised that she would ask him in such a rude manner.  
  
"I mean, we haven't gotten to hear from you yet." A grin broke out on Duncan's face, obviously pleased with why he was put in Saturday detention.  
  
"Well, on Wednesday, we had that substitute teacher in English class." Lance suddenly perked up, because he actually went to his class that day, and got to see the substitute.  
  
~*~Flashback~*~  
  
(Lance's POV) Sitting in the back of the room, as usual, I tried to figure out why I even bothered showing up for class today. Oh, yeah, that's right, the normal boring-as-hell teacher was gone today. Finally, I got a break. The substitute probably wont be much better, but at least I wont have to pay as much attention as usual. Hearing the sound of the door open, I raised my eyes to see who it was, and my stare turned into a glare towards the football player.  
  
(Duncan's POV) Strolling into the classroom, the second thing I noticed was that Alver's guy glaring at me from the back of the room. Man that guy has some serious problems. Sitting down between two of the cheerleaders, I could still feel his eyes boring a hole in my head as I made small talk with the short-skirted, tube-topped females surrounding me. That is, until -she- walked in.  
  
The substitute walked, no, she didn't just walk, she glided into the room. Dressed to kill, the temporary teacher wore a red and black plaid skirt that stopped just short enough that everybody could see her perfectly sculpted, long, tan, smooth (okay, that's enough of that .) legs. She wore a matching red t-shirt that hugged her chest, with a see-through black long-sleeved shirt over it. Wearing black high-heeled shoes, her height reached just over 5 foot 7 inches. Long blonde hair cascaded over her perfect shoulders, ending at her mid-back, curling naturally at the tips. Taking off the sunglasses she wore, the substitute revealed her sparkling ocean blue eyes. Smiling, flashing prodigious, straight and white teeth, she parted her rosy pink lips to introduce herself to everybody.  
  
"Class, my name is Miss Parker." In both Duncan's and Lance's heads, a bell went off about that name. Parker. Simultaneously, they realized where they'd heard the name, and seen her before. 'She's that Victoria's Secret model.'  
  
~*~End Flashback~*~  
  
"Eww, you, and her, after class, locked doors, desktops...eww!" Jean shuddered, too many disturbing images filling her head of Duncan's -after school lesson- with the one called Miss Parker. Lance however, laughed, though he was a bit jealous of the situation.  
  
"Man, what I would give to have been in your situation."  
  
"And you say Scott cant keep control of -his- hormones." Wanda rolled her eyes, the all to familiar smirk back in place.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Heheheh, so what'd you think? Huh? I want reviews, even if you're going to call me a sick pervert or something. I warned you that it would be inappropriate for anybody under the age of 13; I could've gone into better detail. 


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